After a loooong winter off, and a lot of waivering and waffling. And fretting and indecisiveness and basically hiding my head in the sand... I scheduled a lesson with a local trainer. I chose to have a lesson with her because, while she is relatively new to the world of eventing, she is an accomplished adult ammy hunter/jumper rider, and is a "student of the sport" of eventing. She had some very respectable scores at USEA recognized horse trials at BN, and her other students do well. I also had a glimpse into her teaching style at a clinic she hosted at her farm last year when she took me aside when Alfie was having a "TB Moment" and acting up a little. And I liked what she said and how she handled us.
Well the lesson was fantastic. And while we spent a lot of time just walking (I'd say about 60 of the 90 minutes of my ride), we accomplished so, SO much. Alfie's issue with the big scary corner melted away. He ceased cow-kicking when I pushed him towards the corner. He understood that "Yes, I want you to be over there, and no, I won't let that terrible, pony-eating chair/pole/cinderblock/random object hurt you". This new instructor gave me a handful of incredibly useful tools to put in my tool chest to deal with Alfie when he does have his little fits. She also gave me some stretches to do with Alfie before each ride since he is very, very stiff and inflexible. My new accessories shall be a dressage whip and/or little round nubby ball spurs each time I ride. My leg is soooo weak from lack of riding all winter that I can barely push Alfie over, so instructor suggested the new "accessories" to pursuede my noble steed OOOVEERRRRR to where he needs to be. I am master & commander... so, listen up, Alfie!
We also discussed Alfie's overall situation... his feed, his turn out, his history. And my goals. Short term and long term (very... very long term). And I can't really recall having those discussions with a trainer in my "previous life" before my very first lesson with them. I'm so thrilled. Really... so incredibly happy with the way my lesson went and the confidence I gained from it. I will make progress this summer. I will.
In a slightly different, but still related to light, topic... my garden is just chugging along. Spring is such an amazing time of year for me. I love my garden. I love starting it each spring, even if I whine a bit about moving all that dirt every year. I love watching the plants grow--or this year sprout, since I started several things from seed. I admit that I have been giving all the little seedlings a pep talk just about every night. Now, I don't know if it helps or not... but they are looking good! I was thrilled to see a total of 5 green bean seedlings pushing up out of the ground just the other day. I have never, ever grown them before so I'm a little wary (wouldn't you be if the seed packet suggested you "inoculate" your plants?) but encouraged since they seem to be doing just fine at the moment.
I purchased ... well, too much really, but SO CHEAP! About 45 cents a plant from a small, local nursery... Tomatoes (better boy), zucchini, yellow squash (straight neck), egg plant, and I think 4 different kinds of peppers. 3 bell pepper varieties (yellow,orange and an exotic-looking purple!) and banana peppers. 24 plants in all, and I spent less than $12 at the little nursery. They didn't have any unusual varieties of veggies, but I think thats the least we've spent on plants in a long time. I still have to find one of my favorite tomatoes... a variety of grape tomato that looks almost like a cross between a Roma and a grape tomato, they're so big. Its called "Juliet" and its the most delicious little thing. Sweet and a little tangy. I oven-dried some last year and thought I had gone to heaven. We've bought a Juliet for the past three years, so I'll be picking one up soon.
When the plants go in... thats when I know its summer.
Oh, and Lilly Shar Pei is doing GREAT in her new home. Its been... three weeks already I think, and I get an almost daily report from her mom since she works just across the hall from me. Lilly's hair is growing back on her neck where her skin infection was most severe, and she's had all her shots now and tested negative for heartworms. I am without words to express just how happy and grateful I am that Meryl and her husband opened their hearts and home to this little dog. She's a little gem, worthy of a fabulous home.
Don't ask about my gym plans.. since there aren't really any. But happy to report I hover right around 168. I really need to get off my fat behind. That lesson (all 90 minutes of it) really showed me how completely and utterly out of shape I am... and I mostly rode at a walk! Pathetic!
Not much else to report on here... Hank and Gus had their annual today and check out very well overall. Hank was a little... onery... when blood was drawn for his heartworm test, but he tends to get pissy at the vet (he hasn't been the same since his very bad GI issue last summer... when the vet had to... uhm... have a feel in there to make sure everything seemed ok). Gus got different meds for his ear infection that I have been battling on and off for about 3 months. Hopefully the stuff he got today will kick it to the curb!
And that is all... for now. More on gardening, walking your dogs (dammit!) and a really great book next time.
An adult amateur rider's thoughts on work, life, diet, exercise, and of course, the horses she loves.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
What I do with My Days Off
Without a whole lot of explanation, I am lucky to work for a non-profit organization that is closed for many holidays during the year. Many of my friends hate me because every time they turn around, I have yet another day off. Some years it amounts to maybe 7 or 8 days stretched out over the entire year.... some years it feels like we have too many days off!
But to be fair, having those holidays off means I have a lot of catching up to do when I get back to my office, and often when I have several days off in succession, I barely come up for a gasp of air once our building is open after the holiday. Its a trade off, to be sure. But one I gladly make.
So, as if turns out I had Tuesday and Wednesday off last week, and was also off yesterday and today. You want to know what the heck I did with all that time, don't you? Well.... truth be told I did not stay home and eat bon-bons on my couch. I've been busy!
I'm sure you'll all remember "Sharpie"....
Well, I am glad to say that our little friend found a home! I took her to my vet on Wednesday, and aside from a skin infection she's in generally good health. My vet guesses her to be about 8 months old, and he absolutely loved her personality. Very happy, curious and sweet little dog.
After speaking to a co-worker about "Sharpie", she and her husband came over on Saturday to meet her. They fell in love, and took her home. I am happy to say that "Lilly" is now loving her new home, and even got to go out on the boat with her new mom and dad. YAY LILLY!!!
Speaking of Saturday... we had some dirt delivered for the yard and garden that morning...
A lot of dirt.
In fact... it was 18 cubic yards of dirt.
That's a lot of freaking dirt. Just look at that pile! And there's still some in the truck that the driver has to dump out yet. It was going to be a long Easter weekend.
We needed to fill some holes and depressions that were worsened by the extremely wet winter we had here in Georgia, and of course we needed to prep the vegetable garden for this summer. So we (of course my darling husband helped) filled the wheel barrow, pushed the wheel barrow, dumped the wheel barrow (lather, rinse, repeat!) many times. Until we got to the really big ditch/hole/depression in the yard. Then we hooked the dumper to the riding mower and moved mountains of dirt that way!
Then it was on to tilling and filling the garden.
Yes. We have a garden. And why the heck not when you have an acre of property? I think its a nice small garden... but when I tell people its about 12 ft x 25 ft they gasp and say cute, endearing suburban things like "WOW! You must live out in the country!" or "You take care of that yourself?"
Just to clarify....I do not live "way out in the country"... there is a Starbucks about two miles from my mailbox. And yeah, my husband and I take care of that big, scary garden all by ourselves, no day laborers required. Seriously, can people not figure out how tomatoes work? And that they can be grown in the actual ground in a yard? I digress...
The goal of the dirt mountain moving is to get the beds from looking like this, after a long winter of neglect...
sadly, those are weeds. lots. of. weeds.
To this, with some raking and pulling of weeds....
To THIS! Once the tilling, filling and planting is done.
Currently however, there are no plants. This picture is from last summer. Nevertheless, earth was added and tilled and the beds look great, but no plants yet. We tend to wait until the last week of April, to be sure there is zero chance of frost killing our precious plant progeny (say it three times fast!).
I did manage to get some seeds planted though, for late spring/early summer veggies. This morning I planted two kinds of beans (a French pole bean, and some sort of bush bean) along with carrots, radishes, spinach and a mixed lettuce. I have never grown green beans before, so this should be an adventure. And radishes are new for me, too, but only take 25 days to harvest which was appealing to me. If you want kids to get involved with gardening... radishes and lettuce are your best bet. Super fast-growing so kids stay interested!
Growing lettuce from seed has to be one of my favorite things about having a garden... almost as soon as it's germinated you can eat it. I can literally pick my lunch in the morning, fresh from my own garden... only taking as many leaves of lettuce as I need. The rest is all there waiting for me out in the fresh air when I get home... and not smelly and wilty in the veggie bin of the fridge.
In another couple of weeks we will plant zucchini and yellow squash, peppers and possibly eggplant or a couple other things. The peppers need all summer to grow, and squash start and finish rather early. Once the squash wrap up their season, we'll plant tomatoes. I am counting the days....
Easter Sunday I baked and cooked for the family (husband, sister, and our parents). Beef tenderloin, fanned potatoes, rosemary butter roles and grilled asparagus. Carrot cake for dessert. It was an outstanding meal!
I rode my pony... Alfie was happy enough to see me, but was no so excited to work once we got out to the ring. We worked on his listening skills, which are horribly lacking. Lots of circles, figure 8's, changes of direction, etc. so he was on his toes and paying attention to me and not the pile of poles on the ground outside the ring that week after week after week are the scariest things ever. But Alfie's been off all winter, and with more consistent work I know he'll improve. He's shedding like a mammoth, and is in need of a spa day after a winter outside. And oh... that scraggly mane...
I also (no... not done yet...) worked on some printable materials for an equestrian organization I am volunteering my time to. Its a grass roots organization that takes the donations it receives and passes it along to organizers who run Classic Format Events in the form of grants. Even though I have yet to compete in a USEA recognized event, I dream of someday running a classic... its what I fell in love with when I went to watch the Foxhall Cup about 8 years ago. I'm no where near ready to compete in one now, so I support the organization that helps these events financially so that they will still be around for me and Alfie when we are ready.
The documents I've produced are pretty snazzy, if I do say so myself, but its been tougher to get done than I initially thought it would be. Many revisions later, we seem to be happy with the "flyer", the donation form and a few other pieces I made. The goal is to make sure they are all identifiably "ours"... fonts, colors, logos are all cohesive throughout the materials. More are in the works, too. Even though that feels like a part time job unto itself, I am glad to lend my support in the best way I know how.
So that's what I've done with my time off. And walk the dogs a mile each morning. And made my husband dinner on the days I was off. And started the arduous task of swapping out winter clothes for summer... there is never room for it all in the Wee House. I would have liked to play "Lady Of Leisure"... and once in a while I do on my days off... but not this go 'round. And I find, strangely, that I have really enjoyed this time off more so than days when I lounge around in my pj's until 1 o'clock in the afternoon. I've accomplished a lot, and it feels good!
Monday, March 29, 2010
A Friendly Visit
Thursday last was a gorgeous day here in Atlanta, and I was therefore more than happy to take the boys on a walk while Will fiddled with the latch on the Jeep’s tailgate. Hank, Gus and I went about a mile—to the end of the street and back—and when we rounded the corner to walk up the driveway, the three of us were met with a unusual surprise
A Sharpei.
I am absolutely a dog lover… animal-in-general lover… but a stray or loose dog in my yard isn’t my favorite. Mostly because Hank and Gus can’t help themselves and just go a little nutty. So I let the boys bark and bay and scare the dog off. Will came to the end of the driveway, and explained that the dog had been roaming around the yard since I had left for my walk, but wouldn’t come near him. Hm.
Well, I went to bed and thought nothing else of the dog, except hoping it found its way home. Of course I had no idea that she (and it is a she) would “move in”.
We were both able to leave work a little early on Friday, and when we arrived home, “Sharpie” was in our yard. Again. But interestingly she had run out of the bushes. Upon further inspection, she had actually made herself a little nest. Well, now this is a problem. Clearly she has some intention of staying. And Will and I are both suckers for a sad animal.
After we took the boys on their afternoon walk (which, by the way, was incredibly exacerbating and hilarious at once since Hank was having a full blown hissy fit that he had to wear his Gentle Leader.. . and he was wearing it because he saw Sharpie and lost his little doggie mind) we set up a little shelter for Sharpie near our storage shed; opened up one of our dog crates, put a couple old doggie blankets in there, and set out Tupperware containers of food and water. We also covered the crate with a tarp since rain was in the forecast. If Sharpie was going to stay, she might as well eat and be comfortable. Later that night we checked the crate… no Sharpie… but no food either.
Saturday dawned, and Sharpie was in her nest part of the morning, but spent most of the day roaming up and down our road… always going in one direction. Once she came around and was sniffing at the screened porch door, but for the most part she lays down in her little nest in the bushes. We gave her breakfast, though she ran off when she saw us approach. By the time I left for the barn she was wandering the street again, looking slightly dazed. I tossed her some treats and told her to go sit in the crate we outfitted for her. She has yet to take the advice.
Sunday morning our little friend was still around. By mid-afternoon we were worried some thunderstorms would get nasty, and Will tried to lure her with lots and lots of treats into the general vicinity of the crate… but it was a no-go. I watched this all unfold from the kitchen window (where I was making a kick-ass lemon pound cake)… she would only get within about 15 feet of Will and then back away… and even bark at him! But I watched her closely… and got a good look at her.
She’s not skin and bone, but she’s skinny and needs regular meals. She moves quite stiffly, and I think its possible she’s been shot with a pellet gun or something a few times, as evidenced by some small dark spots in her coat. We wondered about her eyesight the previous few days… and Will said it looks like one eye is possibly infected.
Ultimately Sharpie retreated to her nest in the bushes, and sat out the rain. Thankfully the storm did not turn severe… but she as breaking my heart just curled up in a ball, just feet from my house.
This morning I didn’t see her anywhere, not that I looked too hard for her. But sure enough she’s outside my window now… lounging in her pile of leaves. Will put a call in to animal control, and I certainly have mixed feelings about that. I want someone to take her somewhere where she will be dry and warm and safe from the cars that creep right up to her butt when she’s wandering around in the street. But then again… I don’t know what her fate will be once AC has her. I know they can’t all be saved. And she might be suffering so badly now that it might be in her best interest to be put down. I just wish she’d let us near her! Silly doggie! I’d take her to my vet to get a once over and go from there.
I did that with a cat once a few years back. We have had a LOT of animals just show up at our house… which is just bizarre. We’ve had two kittens (one now is named Rosie and lives with my sister and her family in Tampa, the other was reunited with its family), a Racing Pigeon (Franklin, who lives up the road a ways) and the cat Julia Gulia. Julia Gulia was a sweet girl, and was ballsy enough to come right up to our front porch and ask to be let in. She played in the vegetable garden while we worked… an absolute doll. I took her to my vet since she was so friendly, but we learned she was an older girl, and probably in kidney failure. We gave her some fluids, some B Complex and some stinky food to see how she would hold up over the weekend. Monday morning she would not budge from underneath my car… and I knew it wasn’t a good sign. I scooped her up and put her in the back of the car and brought her to my vet to be put down.
I don’t know why I cried so much that day… for a cat that didn’t belong to me… that had only been around for a week or so. And I don’t really even like cats so much because I’m horribly allergic to them. But Julia was somehow special, and I cared about her. And ultimately, I cared for her, by giving her the peace that she needed and deserved. For some cosmic reason, Julia chose our house in her final days
As for Sharpie… I just don’t know. AC says they won’t come by looking for a stray if a person is not at home/on premises. I’ll be home the next two days since my office is closed, but not all day. I don’t want her to get chased away and then not feel safe enough to return. That might be worse than the situation she is currently in. Someone suggested trying to sedate her with something in her food, but I’d have to get something from my vet… or a bunch of Benadryl. And then what would I do with her?
Oh little girl… I wish you’d tell us your story and let us help you. The longer you stay, the more I get to liking you, and the more I want to help.
***update while typing***
AC officer showed up, and off my little friend ran! AC officer asked how long she'd been around, her temperament, etc. Then asked if I'd be around for a few more hours. I told him I needed to go to the grocery store, but I'd be back afterwards. Sure enough when I got home, Sharpie was in her spot.
***NEW UPDATE***
Tuesday night, through the miracle of Bacon, we managed to get a collar and leash on Sharpie, and she is a completely different dog... she is sweet and loving and wants to be with you wherever you go. A complete 180 if I have ever seen one!
We moved the crate we had set up for her to a spot closer to the house, and she slept there for the night. This morning (Wednesday the 31st)she was all wags and wiggles when I went to bring her breakfast and take her out to potty ... which she did NOT do in her crate!! Good girl!
We also got an appointment at our vet, where she was given a once over. Dr. Z. believes her to be less than a year old since her teeth are nice and white. She weighs 30 lbs on the nose, and made friends with everyone in the office. No one believed me that she wouldn't come near us for days.
Bacon is indeed a conduit for miracles.
Sharpie's main issues are a skin infection, which was scraped for mange, etc and turned up negative, and an eye infection, which stems from an inverted eyelid, which it seems is common in Shar-pe'i's. But we have ointment to help her eye, and two weeks (!! is she staying that long?) worth of antibiotics for her skin. We didn't opt for a heartworm test at this time, since we are in contact with a Shar-pei rescue group and hope that they can help with her bigger veterinary bills.
Sharpie and The Boys were formally introduced today, and it was surprisingly a non-issue. Seeing as Hank was shaking with rage when he saw her yesterday, today was a huge improvement!
I'm not sure what we'll do with Sharpie over the next few days... I was lucky enough to have a few days off work to wrangle the situation. As sweet as this little dog is, she can't stay. Wee House is already too wee. So the race is on to find her a home or a foster! If you have ANY leads, please let me know!
A big, huge special THANK YOU! to Dr. Z and the staff at Shallowford Animal Hospital. Dr Z has been our family vet for over 20 years, and I even worked there several times. They are outstanding people and compassionate doctors, and never bat an eye when I bring a stray in for a once over.
A Sharpei.
I am absolutely a dog lover… animal-in-general lover… but a stray or loose dog in my yard isn’t my favorite. Mostly because Hank and Gus can’t help themselves and just go a little nutty. So I let the boys bark and bay and scare the dog off. Will came to the end of the driveway, and explained that the dog had been roaming around the yard since I had left for my walk, but wouldn’t come near him. Hm.
Well, I went to bed and thought nothing else of the dog, except hoping it found its way home. Of course I had no idea that she (and it is a she) would “move in”.
We were both able to leave work a little early on Friday, and when we arrived home, “Sharpie” was in our yard. Again. But interestingly she had run out of the bushes. Upon further inspection, she had actually made herself a little nest. Well, now this is a problem. Clearly she has some intention of staying. And Will and I are both suckers for a sad animal.
After we took the boys on their afternoon walk (which, by the way, was incredibly exacerbating and hilarious at once since Hank was having a full blown hissy fit that he had to wear his Gentle Leader.. . and he was wearing it because he saw Sharpie and lost his little doggie mind) we set up a little shelter for Sharpie near our storage shed; opened up one of our dog crates, put a couple old doggie blankets in there, and set out Tupperware containers of food and water. We also covered the crate with a tarp since rain was in the forecast. If Sharpie was going to stay, she might as well eat and be comfortable. Later that night we checked the crate… no Sharpie… but no food either.
Saturday dawned, and Sharpie was in her nest part of the morning, but spent most of the day roaming up and down our road… always going in one direction. Once she came around and was sniffing at the screened porch door, but for the most part she lays down in her little nest in the bushes. We gave her breakfast, though she ran off when she saw us approach. By the time I left for the barn she was wandering the street again, looking slightly dazed. I tossed her some treats and told her to go sit in the crate we outfitted for her. She has yet to take the advice.
Sunday morning our little friend was still around. By mid-afternoon we were worried some thunderstorms would get nasty, and Will tried to lure her with lots and lots of treats into the general vicinity of the crate… but it was a no-go. I watched this all unfold from the kitchen window (where I was making a kick-ass lemon pound cake)… she would only get within about 15 feet of Will and then back away… and even bark at him! But I watched her closely… and got a good look at her.
She’s not skin and bone, but she’s skinny and needs regular meals. She moves quite stiffly, and I think its possible she’s been shot with a pellet gun or something a few times, as evidenced by some small dark spots in her coat. We wondered about her eyesight the previous few days… and Will said it looks like one eye is possibly infected.
Ultimately Sharpie retreated to her nest in the bushes, and sat out the rain. Thankfully the storm did not turn severe… but she as breaking my heart just curled up in a ball, just feet from my house.
This morning I didn’t see her anywhere, not that I looked too hard for her. But sure enough she’s outside my window now… lounging in her pile of leaves. Will put a call in to animal control, and I certainly have mixed feelings about that. I want someone to take her somewhere where she will be dry and warm and safe from the cars that creep right up to her butt when she’s wandering around in the street. But then again… I don’t know what her fate will be once AC has her. I know they can’t all be saved. And she might be suffering so badly now that it might be in her best interest to be put down. I just wish she’d let us near her! Silly doggie! I’d take her to my vet to get a once over and go from there.
I did that with a cat once a few years back. We have had a LOT of animals just show up at our house… which is just bizarre. We’ve had two kittens (one now is named Rosie and lives with my sister and her family in Tampa, the other was reunited with its family), a Racing Pigeon (Franklin, who lives up the road a ways) and the cat Julia Gulia. Julia Gulia was a sweet girl, and was ballsy enough to come right up to our front porch and ask to be let in. She played in the vegetable garden while we worked… an absolute doll. I took her to my vet since she was so friendly, but we learned she was an older girl, and probably in kidney failure. We gave her some fluids, some B Complex and some stinky food to see how she would hold up over the weekend. Monday morning she would not budge from underneath my car… and I knew it wasn’t a good sign. I scooped her up and put her in the back of the car and brought her to my vet to be put down.
I don’t know why I cried so much that day… for a cat that didn’t belong to me… that had only been around for a week or so. And I don’t really even like cats so much because I’m horribly allergic to them. But Julia was somehow special, and I cared about her. And ultimately, I cared for her, by giving her the peace that she needed and deserved. For some cosmic reason, Julia chose our house in her final days
As for Sharpie… I just don’t know. AC says they won’t come by looking for a stray if a person is not at home/on premises. I’ll be home the next two days since my office is closed, but not all day. I don’t want her to get chased away and then not feel safe enough to return. That might be worse than the situation she is currently in. Someone suggested trying to sedate her with something in her food, but I’d have to get something from my vet… or a bunch of Benadryl. And then what would I do with her?
Oh little girl… I wish you’d tell us your story and let us help you. The longer you stay, the more I get to liking you, and the more I want to help.
***update while typing***
AC officer showed up, and off my little friend ran! AC officer asked how long she'd been around, her temperament, etc. Then asked if I'd be around for a few more hours. I told him I needed to go to the grocery store, but I'd be back afterwards. Sure enough when I got home, Sharpie was in her spot.
***NEW UPDATE***
Tuesday night, through the miracle of Bacon, we managed to get a collar and leash on Sharpie, and she is a completely different dog... she is sweet and loving and wants to be with you wherever you go. A complete 180 if I have ever seen one!
We moved the crate we had set up for her to a spot closer to the house, and she slept there for the night. This morning (Wednesday the 31st)she was all wags and wiggles when I went to bring her breakfast and take her out to potty ... which she did NOT do in her crate!! Good girl!
We also got an appointment at our vet, where she was given a once over. Dr. Z. believes her to be less than a year old since her teeth are nice and white. She weighs 30 lbs on the nose, and made friends with everyone in the office. No one believed me that she wouldn't come near us for days.
Bacon is indeed a conduit for miracles.
Sharpie's main issues are a skin infection, which was scraped for mange, etc and turned up negative, and an eye infection, which stems from an inverted eyelid, which it seems is common in Shar-pe'i's. But we have ointment to help her eye, and two weeks (!! is she staying that long?) worth of antibiotics for her skin. We didn't opt for a heartworm test at this time, since we are in contact with a Shar-pei rescue group and hope that they can help with her bigger veterinary bills.
Sharpie and The Boys were formally introduced today, and it was surprisingly a non-issue. Seeing as Hank was shaking with rage when he saw her yesterday, today was a huge improvement!
I'm not sure what we'll do with Sharpie over the next few days... I was lucky enough to have a few days off work to wrangle the situation. As sweet as this little dog is, she can't stay. Wee House is already too wee. So the race is on to find her a home or a foster! If you have ANY leads, please let me know!
A big, huge special THANK YOU! to Dr. Z and the staff at Shallowford Animal Hospital. Dr Z has been our family vet for over 20 years, and I even worked there several times. They are outstanding people and compassionate doctors, and never bat an eye when I bring a stray in for a once over.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
On Love
I did something really bad this week. Well, actually, since it was something that I forgot about two weeks ago, technically I did something really bad then and only realized it this week. Also bad.
I forgot Stupid Anniversary. It was March 10th and I completely forgot. But so did my husband. And considering we don’t mark the occasion in any special way I guess is not such a huge deal, but I felt terrible when the realization hit me yesterday.
I should explain some of this shouldn’t I?
My husband, Will, decided to join the Marine Corps Reserves so that he could get tuition assistance through the GI Bill. He also wanted to serve our country, as so many males in his family had done before him. When we graduated in 2001, Will was still serving in the Reserves.
Then Stop Loss was enacted, just before his commitment would end. At the beginning of 2003 Will got the word that his unit would be deploying to Iraq. This weighed heavily on us both. At the time we were only dating, but we both knew marriage was part of our long-term plan together. But… what would happen in our time apart? And what if something terrible happened while he was deployed?
About a month before deployment someone at Drill—a sergeant if I am remembering this right—suggested to everyone that if they had a serious girlfriend, now was the time to tie the knot. Will mentioned this to me… and we just sort of looked at one another wondering if we should do it. We weighed the pros and cons… and we decided to get married before he deployed.
It wasn’t fancy… in fact it was nearly comical… Will had reported for duty on March 9th, and the next day we went to the courthouse in downtown Marietta, GA and the judge married us. We were just wearing jeans… poor Will’s had been marked with a nice muddy paw print by our dear Cassie the Wonder Dog. Will’s buddy Marty insisted on being there as a witness, and we could hear him giggling at the back of the room. Then as soon as the papers were signed, Will went back to Base and that was it.
And Stupid Anniversary was born.
I will never forget the day Will left. Thinking about it now… seven years later… makes me cry. My heart truly ached that day… no words can really explain what that feels like. You just know when it happens that that feeling is heartache. That that is what love is—fear, pride, joy, anxiety, worry, faith and hope—mangled up into one gigantic and overwhelming emotion. All focused on someone other than yourself.
Feeling all of those emotions—either on their own or in any combination—and knowing that for the foreseeable future I’d be struggling to keep myself functioning in a “normal” way despite them is likely what made that week in my life a complete whirlwind. And I struggle every year to remember just when the hell Stupid Anniversary is.
You’d think I’d put it on a calendar or tattoo the date across my forehead to remember. But I never do. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because, as I said before, it’s not an occasion we formally celebrate; our wedding (read: real) anniversary is July 3rd and that’s when we go out to dinner and that sort of thing. Maybe I don’t mark it down because when I think about it, I can’t help but relive the moment when Will got on a bus at the Drill Center heading for the airport… and I had to say goodbye not knowing when exactly I’d see him next, and beating back the thought that it was entirely possible I might never get the chance again.
Here would be a good time to mention that the three paragraphs above explain why, to this day, I have severe anxiety about my husband going anywhere that I’m not going. It doesn’t help that Will is an Emergency Manager in real life… which means when a parking garage collapses he’s on scene coordinating different resources. Or when there’s severe weather, he’s the guy that has to drive in that weather to get to his office to open the emergency operations center. Granted he isn’t a first responder… if he was I’d probably be heavily medicated and under the influence of who-knows-what. But that doesn’t mean his firefighter friends don’t ask him to come along with them on the engine, or call him to check out some massive apartment fire. God help me…
Anyway, I guess my point is… well, I don’t really have one. I forgot Stupid Anniversary, and I feel kind of horrible about it. I suppose that sums it up. It is a day that changed our lives dramatically, and really shouldn't be forgotten about.
But, Will, I love you. I’m lucky (most days) to have married you… twice. And I’d do it again and again and again…
I forgot Stupid Anniversary. It was March 10th and I completely forgot. But so did my husband. And considering we don’t mark the occasion in any special way I guess is not such a huge deal, but I felt terrible when the realization hit me yesterday.
I should explain some of this shouldn’t I?
My husband, Will, decided to join the Marine Corps Reserves so that he could get tuition assistance through the GI Bill. He also wanted to serve our country, as so many males in his family had done before him. When we graduated in 2001, Will was still serving in the Reserves.
Then Stop Loss was enacted, just before his commitment would end. At the beginning of 2003 Will got the word that his unit would be deploying to Iraq. This weighed heavily on us both. At the time we were only dating, but we both knew marriage was part of our long-term plan together. But… what would happen in our time apart? And what if something terrible happened while he was deployed?
About a month before deployment someone at Drill—a sergeant if I am remembering this right—suggested to everyone that if they had a serious girlfriend, now was the time to tie the knot. Will mentioned this to me… and we just sort of looked at one another wondering if we should do it. We weighed the pros and cons… and we decided to get married before he deployed.
It wasn’t fancy… in fact it was nearly comical… Will had reported for duty on March 9th, and the next day we went to the courthouse in downtown Marietta, GA and the judge married us. We were just wearing jeans… poor Will’s had been marked with a nice muddy paw print by our dear Cassie the Wonder Dog. Will’s buddy Marty insisted on being there as a witness, and we could hear him giggling at the back of the room. Then as soon as the papers were signed, Will went back to Base and that was it.
And Stupid Anniversary was born.
I will never forget the day Will left. Thinking about it now… seven years later… makes me cry. My heart truly ached that day… no words can really explain what that feels like. You just know when it happens that that feeling is heartache. That that is what love is—fear, pride, joy, anxiety, worry, faith and hope—mangled up into one gigantic and overwhelming emotion. All focused on someone other than yourself.
Feeling all of those emotions—either on their own or in any combination—and knowing that for the foreseeable future I’d be struggling to keep myself functioning in a “normal” way despite them is likely what made that week in my life a complete whirlwind. And I struggle every year to remember just when the hell Stupid Anniversary is.
You’d think I’d put it on a calendar or tattoo the date across my forehead to remember. But I never do. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because, as I said before, it’s not an occasion we formally celebrate; our wedding (read: real) anniversary is July 3rd and that’s when we go out to dinner and that sort of thing. Maybe I don’t mark it down because when I think about it, I can’t help but relive the moment when Will got on a bus at the Drill Center heading for the airport… and I had to say goodbye not knowing when exactly I’d see him next, and beating back the thought that it was entirely possible I might never get the chance again.
Here would be a good time to mention that the three paragraphs above explain why, to this day, I have severe anxiety about my husband going anywhere that I’m not going. It doesn’t help that Will is an Emergency Manager in real life… which means when a parking garage collapses he’s on scene coordinating different resources. Or when there’s severe weather, he’s the guy that has to drive in that weather to get to his office to open the emergency operations center. Granted he isn’t a first responder… if he was I’d probably be heavily medicated and under the influence of who-knows-what. But that doesn’t mean his firefighter friends don’t ask him to come along with them on the engine, or call him to check out some massive apartment fire. God help me…
Anyway, I guess my point is… well, I don’t really have one. I forgot Stupid Anniversary, and I feel kind of horrible about it. I suppose that sums it up. It is a day that changed our lives dramatically, and really shouldn't be forgotten about.
But, Will, I love you. I’m lucky (most days) to have married you… twice. And I’d do it again and again and again…
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
What's it All About, Alfie?
On March 1st, Alfie officially turned 8 years old. I unfortunately wasn’t able to make it to the barn that day, so I made sure to bring him carrots when I went to ride the day before, and I also made sure he had his fair share of Bob’s Soft Peppermints (his favorite treat!). And I finally found and bought the bit I want for him (no small feat!). While we as animal-lovers like to think that our furry friends know it’s a special day, for them their birthdays come and go with as much fanfare as an average Wednesday. Just another day to eat grain and hay and chase friends in the pasture.
But March 1, 2010 was more than just another day for Alfie. For the first time in years—if not in his entire life—Alfie was deeply loved by His Person on his birthday even if he was oblivious to that fact. I thought about him all day, and hoped that he was getting lots of pats and scratches from his barn manager, and hoped that maybe she read him the note I left on the dry-erase board. I felt horribly guilty I wasn’t there to hug Alfie and groom him and fuss all over him on his special day. Silly? Yes… but I’ve been known to make birthday cakes for my dogs. No lie.
Alfie has a storied life for one so young, and my heart aches for the cruelty he has known in that time. Out of Given Terms, by Chester House, someone somewhere had grand plans for Alfie at one point. He sold at Keenland for $85,000 in 2002 and broke his maiden at Churchill Downs in November, 2004 (a $47,000 race). He won his first the following February at the Fair Grounds, but sadly by January of '06 he was entered in low-end claiming races with a price of $5,000 on his head. At some point he ended up in the wrong hands and was beaten and treated like trash. Thankfully someone intervened, bought Alfie from the trainer/owner who clearly didn’t give a damn about him, and he found his way to Georgia hours after his final race at Philadelphia Park.
I’m officially starting a new chapter in Alfie’s life this month. We’ve had the entire winter off, and its now time to get up and move! I’ve already got plans in the works to build up his fitness (and mine!) so we can start with lessons again, and I have my calendar marked up with dates of schooling shows and clinics through the spring and summer. We’re starting fresh and by the end of this month I hope to have a 3-, 6- and 12-month plan for our training. My hope is that for his 9th birthday Alfie will be feeling the wind in his face, cantering across a Beginner Novice course.
But even if we don’t get that far in 12 months, Alfie will still be loved and adored for the boy he is.
So ...Many Happy Returns of the Day, Alfie! I love you.
But March 1, 2010 was more than just another day for Alfie. For the first time in years—if not in his entire life—Alfie was deeply loved by His Person on his birthday even if he was oblivious to that fact. I thought about him all day, and hoped that he was getting lots of pats and scratches from his barn manager, and hoped that maybe she read him the note I left on the dry-erase board. I felt horribly guilty I wasn’t there to hug Alfie and groom him and fuss all over him on his special day. Silly? Yes… but I’ve been known to make birthday cakes for my dogs. No lie.
Alfie has a storied life for one so young, and my heart aches for the cruelty he has known in that time. Out of Given Terms, by Chester House, someone somewhere had grand plans for Alfie at one point. He sold at Keenland for $85,000 in 2002 and broke his maiden at Churchill Downs in November, 2004 (a $47,000 race). He won his first the following February at the Fair Grounds, but sadly by January of '06 he was entered in low-end claiming races with a price of $5,000 on his head. At some point he ended up in the wrong hands and was beaten and treated like trash. Thankfully someone intervened, bought Alfie from the trainer/owner who clearly didn’t give a damn about him, and he found his way to Georgia hours after his final race at Philadelphia Park.
I’m officially starting a new chapter in Alfie’s life this month. We’ve had the entire winter off, and its now time to get up and move! I’ve already got plans in the works to build up his fitness (and mine!) so we can start with lessons again, and I have my calendar marked up with dates of schooling shows and clinics through the spring and summer. We’re starting fresh and by the end of this month I hope to have a 3-, 6- and 12-month plan for our training. My hope is that for his 9th birthday Alfie will be feeling the wind in his face, cantering across a Beginner Novice course.
But even if we don’t get that far in 12 months, Alfie will still be loved and adored for the boy he is.
So ...Many Happy Returns of the Day, Alfie! I love you.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Exposed!
As a horseperson, I like to ready “horsey” things. Some books, yes, but I really enjoy getting my monthly Practical Horseman magazine, and I tend to read it cover to cover. One of my favorite columns is Jim Wofford’s “Cross Country Clinic.” Its always educational, and usually witty. Right up my alley. A few months ago he shared a story about a woman he taught in a clinic who—Jim made clear—was too large for her horse, quickly tired, and eventually had an unplanned dismount. Oh! The letters that were written to PH afterwards! Were people really taking Wofford to heart? Did they think he was calling them fat ladies? Sheesh… get a life folks!
In January of this year, PH published an article about eventer Becky Holder, and her success with a commitment to better eating and fitness. I could relate to both Jim’s point-- that riders (like the one he wrote about) shouldn’t put undue weight on their horses, and to Becky’s point of view… that fitness isn’t about a size, its about being healthy and strong for ourselves and our equine partners. So I wrote to PH, and shared my thoughts with them about these two articles…. And thought nothing more of it.
Until yesterday, when I flipped through my newest PH that had just arrived in the mail and saw my name in big bold letters in the “Your Turn” section of the magazine. CRAP! What have I done!?!? Now the entire equestrian world knows I am a fat, fat pig! I thought that information was just between me and the three of you who actually read this blog!
I paced around and panicked a few minutes… then franticly texted a couple members of the ME Team. They actually thought it was cool. Cool? COOL?!?! Are you kidding? Well.. now wait… let's stop and think about this a minute. Maybe it is cool. Afterall, I started this blog to share my story and my life. Why am I complaining about it appearing in a magazine where I’m a faceless nobody? Shouldn’t the appearance of my letter in a nationally published magazine be even more motivation for me to carry on with and stick to my goals?
Yeah, it should be. So see it for yourself here. Click on the blue “inside” button. I’m “Amanda F Smith, Georgia”. Its not anything you haven’t seen here, really, but it is kinda cool to see it somewhere... you know... real.
Now… here’s another issue… with my recent... *ahem* notoriety... do I really and truly go public with the blog? I’ve shared with a few friends that I have this wacky little project going on. But do I let everyone know? I’m not sure…
Weight Loss Update
One of the things I love about WW online (remember, that’s Weight Watchers) is all the little tools it gives you. Oodles and oodles of food items you can search for to make tracking your Points easy, a Points calculator, and even a recipe builder (!!). But I particularly like this cart:
Yup, that’s where I’ve been. The purple line is where I want to go. Where the chart dead-ends is where I am now. 171.2lbs. Periodically you get a little colored star that denotes different milestones (first 10 pounds lost, additional 5 pounds lost, etc) to keep you motivated. It is worth mentioning that this chart represents the entire length of time I have been on WW, about a year and a half. The steep bit at the beginning of the chart looks scary, but was really only a loss of about 2 pounds per week, which is good and healthy.
Hopefully I'll continue a downward trend, and not so many more "uphill" sections will show up on the chart!
Alfie Update
It was absolutely, drop dead, unbelievably gorgeous here in Georgia this weekend, so I took the time to visit and ride my horse twice! Saturday and Sunday the temps were in the mid- to upper-60’s and the sun just beckoned one to be outside. And that’s where I was!
Alfie was a little more relaxed and focused than usual, and I was very pleased about that. Considering he’s (a) still fairly green and (b) really done nothing but eat and poop all winter, he was good as gold. I couldn’t have asked for more. His birthday is March 1st, so look for a little post all about the little guy next week!
In January of this year, PH published an article about eventer Becky Holder, and her success with a commitment to better eating and fitness. I could relate to both Jim’s point-- that riders (like the one he wrote about) shouldn’t put undue weight on their horses, and to Becky’s point of view… that fitness isn’t about a size, its about being healthy and strong for ourselves and our equine partners. So I wrote to PH, and shared my thoughts with them about these two articles…. And thought nothing more of it.
Until yesterday, when I flipped through my newest PH that had just arrived in the mail and saw my name in big bold letters in the “Your Turn” section of the magazine. CRAP! What have I done!?!? Now the entire equestrian world knows I am a fat, fat pig! I thought that information was just between me and the three of you who actually read this blog!
I paced around and panicked a few minutes… then franticly texted a couple members of the ME Team. They actually thought it was cool. Cool? COOL?!?! Are you kidding? Well.. now wait… let's stop and think about this a minute. Maybe it is cool. Afterall, I started this blog to share my story and my life. Why am I complaining about it appearing in a magazine where I’m a faceless nobody? Shouldn’t the appearance of my letter in a nationally published magazine be even more motivation for me to carry on with and stick to my goals?
Yeah, it should be. So see it for yourself here. Click on the blue “inside” button. I’m “Amanda F Smith, Georgia”. Its not anything you haven’t seen here, really, but it is kinda cool to see it somewhere... you know... real.
Now… here’s another issue… with my recent... *ahem* notoriety... do I really and truly go public with the blog? I’ve shared with a few friends that I have this wacky little project going on. But do I let everyone know? I’m not sure…
Weight Loss Update
One of the things I love about WW online (remember, that’s Weight Watchers) is all the little tools it gives you. Oodles and oodles of food items you can search for to make tracking your Points easy, a Points calculator, and even a recipe builder (!!). But I particularly like this cart:
Yup, that’s where I’ve been. The purple line is where I want to go. Where the chart dead-ends is where I am now. 171.2lbs. Periodically you get a little colored star that denotes different milestones (first 10 pounds lost, additional 5 pounds lost, etc) to keep you motivated. It is worth mentioning that this chart represents the entire length of time I have been on WW, about a year and a half. The steep bit at the beginning of the chart looks scary, but was really only a loss of about 2 pounds per week, which is good and healthy.
Hopefully I'll continue a downward trend, and not so many more "uphill" sections will show up on the chart!
Alfie Update
It was absolutely, drop dead, unbelievably gorgeous here in Georgia this weekend, so I took the time to visit and ride my horse twice! Saturday and Sunday the temps were in the mid- to upper-60’s and the sun just beckoned one to be outside. And that’s where I was!
Alfie was a little more relaxed and focused than usual, and I was very pleased about that. Considering he’s (a) still fairly green and (b) really done nothing but eat and poop all winter, he was good as gold. I couldn’t have asked for more. His birthday is March 1st, so look for a little post all about the little guy next week!
Monday, February 15, 2010
So, About this Diet and Exercise Thing…
Let’s talk honestly here for a minute. Painful as that may be, its important. We all have flaws and faults and things we want to change. That’s completely ok. Like the saying goes… “the first step is admitting you have a problem.” In recognizing that there’s an issue, there is room for improvement. If you refuse to acknowledge your own issues, you can’t very well move on, can you? In order to make this easier on the rest of you (all three of the rest of you!) I’ll go first. Lord, save me from embarrassment…
The Dreaded Truth
On August 1st, 2008 I weighed a whopping (here’s the embarrassing part) 190 lbs. I’m only 5’5”, so that’s pretty freaking gross. I had been aware of this problem for some time, and I knew I needed to do something about it, but for whatever reason, I wasn’t moved to change anything. But one afternoon, as I was getting ready to leave my office, I thought “You know what? This is just bullshit. I’m fat. I shouldn’t be fat. I don’t want to be fat.” And before I logged off my computer I went to Weight Watchers On-line and signed up.
By October of that year, I was down to about 165lbs. My husband and I had also joined a gym that summer, so between the Gym and Weigh Watchers (WW from here on out) I had lost about 25 pounds of flubby and mushy in a few months. My fitness was greatly improved. I was ecstatic. I was getting lots of compliments from friends and co-workers, and I was so motivated to keep it going. My goal weight was 140, and I knew I could do it. I was already half way there!
Then I got a crappy cold. Then my birthday. Then Thanksgiving. Then Christmas… and New Years… and before you know it Easter, which means Cadbury Eggs. And then summer, which is Ice Cream season, and before you know it you’re right back at Halloween again, which should be called “Eat for Three Months Straight Eve.” Its not widely popular as an official holiday yet, but I’m working on it.
*sigh*
I currently weigh 171.8 lbs. Considering that I have gone a whole YEAR without keeping track of my WW points, and really slacking off at the Gym (I was going 3-4 times a week), I haven’t done too badly with keeping my weight off. But I know I can do better. And I will do better. The best way to do that, for me, is to jump on the wagon again.
What I Did
First and foremost, at the beginning of 2010 I re-committed myself (feel free to laugh at that phrase all you want) to reaching my original goal weight. I started keeping track of my WW points again as a way to be accountable to myself for myself. At the first of the year, I actually weighed a few pounds more than I do now… so I’ve already lost some weight. I also decided to start this blog… its another way to be accountable, in a way, but I also feel like writing down what I’ve been doing and where I am on my journey will be another form of positive reinforcement that I can share with someone else (again… all three of you!).
Second, I started with workout baby-steps. This may be laziness on my part, and y’all can think that if you want. But let me tell you something… I typically can’t bring myself to leave the house once I get home in the winter time. Its already dark when I get there… add the cold to that and I’m not feeling motivated to do much of anything but sit on the couch in my jammies. This winter has been incredibly and unusually cold and damp, so I have not yet been back to my gym in many moons.
I did start doing 30 minutes of cardio on my mini stair-stepper once a week for the past couple of weeks while I watch TV. I don’t think its as good as a treadmill or an elliptical machine, but its something, and knowing me during winter is the reason I bought it. I also occasionally supplement my stair-stepping with the On Demand workout routines my cable company offers.
A moment of praise for “Fitness TV”… I love it. L.O.V.E. IT. And while I don’t visit Fitness TV as much as I should, when I do, I am always so impressed with the volume and variety of workouts available any time I want to use them. From 4 week “make over” workout regimens, to 15 minute “build a better butt” quickies, from Pilates to kickbox cardio, they have it all.
When I opt for one of these On Demand workouts, I usually do more than one. I’ll browse through the (never ending) menu of options, and find a couple that target the area(s) I want to target and are short… about 20 minutes or less. This tactic is two-fold; Mentally, I feel like its easier to handle and less daunting to complete two smaller workouts than one big one, and also I can do two totally different things in less than an hour—like cardio and Pilates. Or Legs and core strength.
Next Steps
Getting myself back to the gym is going to be a big hurdle, and I’m not really sure why. It shouldn’t be. Its as easy as hopping in the car and driving three miles down the road. Maybe it’s the misconception that everyone at the gym is watching you. Maybe its guilt or shame I’m feeling about all the months that I have been paying my membership, but haven’t been going.
I also want to be able to actually ride Alfie more often. I can be as “gym fit” as I want to be, but that doesn’t translate into “riding fit”… and vice versa. I could be fit enough to run five miles a day, but that doesn’t mean I have the core stability and the right kind of strength to ride for 30 minutes.
I’ve considered starting the workouts that are in the book “The Rider’s Fitness Program”… but part of me is a little intimidated. It’s a 6 week schedule with three different workouts each week. Each workout is only 6 or 7 different exercises… but looking at the pictures of the exercises and machines and equipment in the book, I get the heebie-jeebies. The weight machines at the gym kind of intimidate me anyway… even the simple ones. But add to that different moves and attaching certain handles to the cables… and I feel like I’m in over my head.
Maybe that is my problem. Maybe I’m trying to do too much. But what is a good balanced approach to all of these things? Ah HA! That’s why the blog is here… I don’t have an answer now, but I’m sure I’ll figure it out by trial and error eventually. You now see where baby steps come in handy for me.
Final Thoughts
We all want to be fit and healthy. We all want to look fantastic in our breeches. But we aren’t all blessed with that long, lithe body the models in the Dover catalog have, so we have to work hard in able to look half that good.
But when it comes down to it, what motivated me was Alfie. Why should I expect him to cart my over-weight ass around when I wasn’t doing anything about it? He could safely carry me around, sure, but was it fair? Especially when I knew I should weigh less? Not really. He’s been used to feather-weight jockeys riding him… and here I come at twice that weight. With me at a healthier weight, Alfie would be able to do his job more easily, and quite possibly better. I would also be able to do my job better, as a rider, too. The advantage to losing weight was beneficial to me and Alfie as a team. If I want Alfie to eat the right things and stay fit, why shouldn’t I want that for myself?
Bottom line… you have to be properly motivated. You lose the weight and get fit because you’ll be able to do more with your kids, or you’ll be able to run that half marathon, or because you want to just look good. But its YOUR DECISION. Do it because you want to, and for the reasons that are right for you. Don’t do it because someone else tells you to do so over and over again. Its your life, and your call. It will mean so much more to you when you reach your goal than it would if you were merely trying to please others. Period.
The Dreaded Truth
On August 1st, 2008 I weighed a whopping (here’s the embarrassing part) 190 lbs. I’m only 5’5”, so that’s pretty freaking gross. I had been aware of this problem for some time, and I knew I needed to do something about it, but for whatever reason, I wasn’t moved to change anything. But one afternoon, as I was getting ready to leave my office, I thought “You know what? This is just bullshit. I’m fat. I shouldn’t be fat. I don’t want to be fat.” And before I logged off my computer I went to Weight Watchers On-line and signed up.
By October of that year, I was down to about 165lbs. My husband and I had also joined a gym that summer, so between the Gym and Weigh Watchers (WW from here on out) I had lost about 25 pounds of flubby and mushy in a few months. My fitness was greatly improved. I was ecstatic. I was getting lots of compliments from friends and co-workers, and I was so motivated to keep it going. My goal weight was 140, and I knew I could do it. I was already half way there!
Then I got a crappy cold. Then my birthday. Then Thanksgiving. Then Christmas… and New Years… and before you know it Easter, which means Cadbury Eggs. And then summer, which is Ice Cream season, and before you know it you’re right back at Halloween again, which should be called “Eat for Three Months Straight Eve.” Its not widely popular as an official holiday yet, but I’m working on it.
*sigh*
I currently weigh 171.8 lbs. Considering that I have gone a whole YEAR without keeping track of my WW points, and really slacking off at the Gym (I was going 3-4 times a week), I haven’t done too badly with keeping my weight off. But I know I can do better. And I will do better. The best way to do that, for me, is to jump on the wagon again.
What I Did
First and foremost, at the beginning of 2010 I re-committed myself (feel free to laugh at that phrase all you want) to reaching my original goal weight. I started keeping track of my WW points again as a way to be accountable to myself for myself. At the first of the year, I actually weighed a few pounds more than I do now… so I’ve already lost some weight. I also decided to start this blog… its another way to be accountable, in a way, but I also feel like writing down what I’ve been doing and where I am on my journey will be another form of positive reinforcement that I can share with someone else (again… all three of you!).
Second, I started with workout baby-steps. This may be laziness on my part, and y’all can think that if you want. But let me tell you something… I typically can’t bring myself to leave the house once I get home in the winter time. Its already dark when I get there… add the cold to that and I’m not feeling motivated to do much of anything but sit on the couch in my jammies. This winter has been incredibly and unusually cold and damp, so I have not yet been back to my gym in many moons.
I did start doing 30 minutes of cardio on my mini stair-stepper once a week for the past couple of weeks while I watch TV. I don’t think its as good as a treadmill or an elliptical machine, but its something, and knowing me during winter is the reason I bought it. I also occasionally supplement my stair-stepping with the On Demand workout routines my cable company offers.
A moment of praise for “Fitness TV”… I love it. L.O.V.E. IT. And while I don’t visit Fitness TV as much as I should, when I do, I am always so impressed with the volume and variety of workouts available any time I want to use them. From 4 week “make over” workout regimens, to 15 minute “build a better butt” quickies, from Pilates to kickbox cardio, they have it all.
When I opt for one of these On Demand workouts, I usually do more than one. I’ll browse through the (never ending) menu of options, and find a couple that target the area(s) I want to target and are short… about 20 minutes or less. This tactic is two-fold; Mentally, I feel like its easier to handle and less daunting to complete two smaller workouts than one big one, and also I can do two totally different things in less than an hour—like cardio and Pilates. Or Legs and core strength.
Next Steps
Getting myself back to the gym is going to be a big hurdle, and I’m not really sure why. It shouldn’t be. Its as easy as hopping in the car and driving three miles down the road. Maybe it’s the misconception that everyone at the gym is watching you. Maybe its guilt or shame I’m feeling about all the months that I have been paying my membership, but haven’t been going.
I also want to be able to actually ride Alfie more often. I can be as “gym fit” as I want to be, but that doesn’t translate into “riding fit”… and vice versa. I could be fit enough to run five miles a day, but that doesn’t mean I have the core stability and the right kind of strength to ride for 30 minutes.
I’ve considered starting the workouts that are in the book “The Rider’s Fitness Program”… but part of me is a little intimidated. It’s a 6 week schedule with three different workouts each week. Each workout is only 6 or 7 different exercises… but looking at the pictures of the exercises and machines and equipment in the book, I get the heebie-jeebies. The weight machines at the gym kind of intimidate me anyway… even the simple ones. But add to that different moves and attaching certain handles to the cables… and I feel like I’m in over my head.
Three workouts a week, plus riding 3 or 4 days a week, plus needing to get 3 or 4 days of cardio in per week… When am I going to have time to even do all of that? I work a full time job! And it takes me an hour to get there and an hour to get home! And what about making dinner for myself and Dear Husband? And walking the hounds? And cleaning the house and doing laundry and… sleeping? Its overwhelming!!!
Maybe that is my problem. Maybe I’m trying to do too much. But what is a good balanced approach to all of these things? Ah HA! That’s why the blog is here… I don’t have an answer now, but I’m sure I’ll figure it out by trial and error eventually. You now see where baby steps come in handy for me.
Final Thoughts
We all want to be fit and healthy. We all want to look fantastic in our breeches. But we aren’t all blessed with that long, lithe body the models in the Dover catalog have, so we have to work hard in able to look half that good.
But when it comes down to it, what motivated me was Alfie. Why should I expect him to cart my over-weight ass around when I wasn’t doing anything about it? He could safely carry me around, sure, but was it fair? Especially when I knew I should weigh less? Not really. He’s been used to feather-weight jockeys riding him… and here I come at twice that weight. With me at a healthier weight, Alfie would be able to do his job more easily, and quite possibly better. I would also be able to do my job better, as a rider, too. The advantage to losing weight was beneficial to me and Alfie as a team. If I want Alfie to eat the right things and stay fit, why shouldn’t I want that for myself?
Bottom line… you have to be properly motivated. You lose the weight and get fit because you’ll be able to do more with your kids, or you’ll be able to run that half marathon, or because you want to just look good. But its YOUR DECISION. Do it because you want to, and for the reasons that are right for you. Don’t do it because someone else tells you to do so over and over again. Its your life, and your call. It will mean so much more to you when you reach your goal than it would if you were merely trying to please others. Period.
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